When Life Gets Heavy (A Love Letter Before I Go)

Sometimes the most radical thing we can do is admit we need to rest.

Hey Human,

I'm sorry I didn't say hello last week—I'll tell you about it in a moment, but first:

How are you? (Really)

How are you navigating the highs and lows of life? Are you carving out space for rest, recovery, and reflection?

If you realize you're not doing great and need some rest, please take it. I'll be spending a few hours in the park tomorrow with my color pencils and coloring books, learning how to exhale again.

My grounding words this week have been simple but powerful: "I am safe."

When Life Gets Heavy

Truth is, I don't have the words... but I wanted to tell you I'll be stepping away for a few weeks—maybe 1-2 months—because life has been heavy.

I desperately want to keep showing up (it's what I know how to do), but I'd just be clawing at the little energy I have left. My sibling is really sick, and carrying that weight feels endless some days. Immigration battles hang over me like a deck of encyclopedias on my head.

Barcelona remains beautiful but unbelievably lonely—my classes run 7-10pm exactly when the world is socializing.

It's been healing to acknowledge this weight, to finally say "your lack of deep friendships isn't your fault, Oibiee... this season is just structured like that." I'm usually so "everything is figure-outable," but some things need to be lived through, not solved.

I have this terrible habit of powering through everything, but it's showing up in my mind, my creativity, my routines—never a good sign. So this season, I'm learning to carry less, to recognize when the load is too much.

But first, I need to set everything down... start from zero, then discover a healthier limit. Otherwise, I'll run myself into the ground.

What's Been Holding Me

In this tender space, I've found small anchors:

Coloring books and the meditation of staying inside the lines. Reading notes from Caroline in the Garden and newsletters from Rosemary Schultz (especially this beautiful piece about being human).

Scrolling through strangers' thoughts and finding humans living courageously in their humanity.

The simple ritual of making and eating salads—something about caring for my body when everything feels chaotic

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Crying!!!! Oh, the sweet relief of tears streaming down my face without apologizing for them.

Calling friends ten times a day and having them hold space for my unraveling. Getting unexpected messages from their mothers—kindness from the most surprising places.

What I've Been Missing

Hands on my shoulders as the tears flow.

Someone cooking me a meal as pure care—not because I asked, but because they noticed.

Small Rebellions & Discoveries

I slept on the couch because I wanted a completely new experience (it was the most amazing nap).

I've been handwriting emails—something about pen on paper keeps me tethered to myself.

I spoke up... I said "I'm not okay" out loud, and it was terrifying but necessary.

I caught myself trying to use work as a crutch to avoid the pain, and I'm learning to resist that old pattern.

I've been tempted to chase dreams in this fragile time (hello, over-productive me trying to rise up!), but I'm choosing rest instead.

This is me saying life has been really something, and I need to step away. But I will be back—maybe with new songs, definitely with stories.

Till Sometime Soon,
With love & laughter,
Oibiee